Book of Song

Brave Sir Robin

by Neill Innes

Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot
He was not afraid to die, oh brave Sir Robin
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin

He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin

His head smashed in, and his heart cut out
And his liver removed, and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped, and his bottom burned off
And his penis ...

Robin: "Thats enough music for now lads, looks like there's dirty work afoot!
Three-headed Knight: "Halt, Who art thou?!"
Minstrels: " He is brave Sir Robin, Brave Sir Robin..."
Robin: "Shut up! ...Um, Nobody really, I was just passing through"
Three-headed Knight: "What do you want!?"
Minstrels: "To fight and ..!"
Robin: "Shut up! Um, nothing really just to pass through good Sir Knight"

Brave Sir Robin ran away,
Bravely ran away, away
When danger reared its ugly head,
he bravely turned his tail and fled
Yes, brave Sir Robin turned about
and gallantly, he chickened out
Bravely taking to his feet
He beat a very brave retreat
Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin
Bravest of the brave, Sir Robin